Against the Current

"Jeff Kane: We are looking to buy a boat. Boatyard Owner: You sure can't have one for free... Ha-ha-ha [laughter, slowing turning into hysterical cough; also declining any help offer with a hand-sign. All shocked, cough lasts for about 20-25 seconds, and at the end, he spits out, saying:] Boatyard Owner: What kinda boat? Jeff Kane: [totally confused] What? Boatyard Owner: What kind of boat you're looking for? Jeff Kane: Oh... aah... smallest one you got... Boatyard Owner: Like a canoe? [laughing, accompanied with small, scary cough] Paul Thompson: A motor-boat... with a weak motor... Boatyard Owner: A weak motor? Jeff Kane: Weakest one you got. Katie: He's gonna swim down the river to the city, and we need to ride next to him. So, you know, just anything that you could put along the side... Boatyard Owner: You swim to New York City? Paul Thompson: Yep. Boatyard Owner: Some sorta charity type of thing? A dollar for a mile, or something? Paul Thompson: Not really. Boatyard Owner: Hmmm... Well, I got an old whaler, with an old 70-horse-power engine, couldn't outrun the turtle [showing them to the coast, to the boat. Small cough and all move towards the coast] Boatyard Owner: Twenty-four hundred bucks... Paul Thompson: [almost immediately] Sounds reasonable... Jeff Kane: Yea, I believe that's the going rate for all boats with weak engines. Boatyard Owner: You folks done much boating before? [small cough - everyone looking at each other...] Katie: Uhmmm... I have. I went to the summer camp on lake Oregon. We had a water skiing, sometimes they let us steer a boat. Boatyard Owner: Well, this boat couldn't pull the turtle, much less a skier. Jeff Kane: What's with the turtles? Boatyard Owner: [after a short pause] Piloting a boat is lot different from driving a car. Jeff Kane: But, it, uh... starts with a key, right? Boatyard Owner: Yeah. But it has no breaks for starters... Jeff Kane: Neither did my last car. I think we will fine."